Don't Roof Rack Me, Bro!

I live a somewhat transparent life.  Beyond what I reveal here, those who know me best know that I enjoy talking about all matter of personal trivia, from my hatred of Roger Clemens for throwing a broken bat at Mike Piazza in the 2000 Worlds Series, to my indifference to animals, to my love of sleeping past 10:30 AM.  I make no secret about what I like and do not like.  

Two personal topics that I have shared on these pages without reservation are my mistrust of Mitt Romney under the direction of a Republican Congress and my passion for all things Devo.  There’s nothing like an afternoon reading incendiary political blogs about Mitt’s habit of inventing facts while jamming to a full block of Devo classics.  Skim Talking Points Memo while blasting Swelling Itching Brain (S.I.B.) from your favorite device and you’ll know what I mean.  So imagine my pleasant surprise when I read that my two interests were intertwined on this day like a chocolate bar being dropped into a vat of peanut butter, creating one irresistible flavor sensation.  Whip it good!

Rolling Stone magazine reports that Devo is releasing a song later this month about Mitt Romney's roof surfing dog, Seamus.  The title leaves no doubt about the song’s subject:  "Don't Roof Rack Me, Bro! (Remember Seamus)."  No doubt set to a classic staccato Devo techno beat, this one is sure to be an underground blogger’s one hit wonder, if not an FM AOR station chart buster.

This is all I know about the tune at this point, but based on the title it is obviously inspired by Romney's notorious road trip from Massachusetts to Ontario, during which he transported the family dog, Seamus, in a kennel strapped to the roof of his station wagon.  The canine vomit and the doggie diarrhea notwithstanding, Romney insists that Seamus enjoyed the rooftop adventure.  No doubt he looked into Seamus’ soul the way Bush saw into Vlad Putin with such clarity.

Devo's founder and commercial director, Gerald V. Casale, is promoting the track as part of his kick off of his Remember Seamus campaign, which is supposed to help "make 2012 the year where animals like Seamus are valued and honesty is praised."  If there is a connection between Seamus and honesty, I don’t see it, but then again, the lyrics to Devo’s classic Smart Patrol/Mr. DNA have me befuddled to this day.  Great tune, though, and perhaps that is all that matters.  With dogs, isn’t it obedience and not honesty that gets praised?

  

Ah, I miss the heady days of my young being indoctrinated by politically motivated new wave tunes, and this Seamus release could mark the return of that heart-thumping genre.  I long for the days when I could bang my head and mosh to XTC’s Melt the Guns, or Midnight Oil’s U.S. Forces, or Heaven 17’s We Don’t Need That Fascist Groove Thing.  If our youth are to become aware of the issues of the day, we’ve got to reach them where they live.  They live with iPod buds in their ears. 

 

Devo is also helping to back Dogs Against Romney, with Casale designing a special edition shirt for the group.  With voter ID laws being implemented across the nation, the drive to suppress the canine vote may render this campaign to encourage dogs to vote against Romney moot.  If you think minorities and the elderly will have a hard time getting a valid photo ID in Pennsylvania, let’s see if your cocker spaniel has any luck.  My guess is that only pets with the proper papers will be welcomed on Election Day, and I don’t mean the kind of papers you train them on.  What kind of a country are we living in where only pure breds can vote? 

 

Casale is also involved in an upcoming smartphone game called The Crate Escape: Seamus Unleashed, which is scheduled for release on National Dog Day.  I do not own a smartphone, but my daughter does.  What are the odds I talk her into downloading this game?  Don’t bet against it.  I’ll don my vintage Freedom of Choice energy dome, my Devo yellow radiation jumpsuit and curl up next to my turntable for some Crate Escape and Duty Now For the Future, side one.

The entry of The Spudboys and their message of devolution into the political narrative for 2012 should spice up the final weeks for me.  I know it is Morning in America when 51% of the voting public in this country is humming a Devo on the way to the polling station.  Crack that whip!

It’s a beautiful world we live in

A sweet romantic place

Beautiful people everywhere

The way they comb their hair

Makes me want to say

It’s a beautiful world.