Hockey and politics have a long history together.
The owners of all 30 National Hockey League
franchises voted last week to lock the players out pending the completion of a
new collective bargaining agreement. The
existing agreement, ratified in 2005, expired this week with owners seeking
reduced player salaries and players insisting that owners implement a team
revenue sharing system to address the league’s fiscal problems. No new talks are scheduled.
NHL players struck in April 1992, causing 30
games to be postponed. The 1994-95 lock-out
ended after 103 days and the cancellation of 468 games. A year-long dispute forced the cancellation
of the entire 2004-05 season when the league successfully held out for a cap on
player’s salaries. This represents the
third labor stoppage under the leadership of avowed hockey-hater Commissioner
Gary Bettman, but not every player holds the commissioner responsible this
time.
Tim Thomas, star goaltender for the Boston
Bruins, blamed the lock out on a likely source – President Barack Obama. Thomas has been an outspoken critic of the
President, even skipping his team’s traditional White House visit as a protest after
winning the 2011 Stanley Cup. Blaming the
U.S. President for the hockey lock out, however, represents a new level of
vitriol in the pitched election battle between Obama and Mitt Romney, former
Governor of a rabid hockey state.
“Obama claims he can be a friend of job creators,
but during his administration, not one new job in hockey has been created. Zero. The
NHL expanded under the Bush administration, adding Columbus
and Minnesota. Under Obama, Atlanta
left town and went to Canada. The record is clear. Obama is good for Canadian jobs, but not for
American jobs,” Thomas asserted during a rambling news conference in which he
took shots from the assembled media. “He
just doesn’t give a puck about people.”
Mitt Romney, locked in a tight battle with the
President for the Presidency, agreed with Tim Thomas’ comments. “I am from Michigan and I love hockey. I have many friends in the game that own
franchises. I agree with Thomas even
though he is a goalie. If the owners
make more money, it’s common sense that those earnings will trickle down to the
players. A rising tide lifts all
yachts.”
“You know, as a young hockey player, I once
scored a double play during the first quarter of a game.”
Vice Presidential candidate Paul Ryan, a product
of Wisconsin,
has deep roots in the game of hockey as well and joined in Thomas’ condemnation
of Obama’s policies. “The game of hockey
and this country need another Miracle on Ice, and with Barack Obama in the
White House, all we can expect is a warming trend causing smaller ice
surfaces. Hockey cannot thrive with a
basketball fan in the Oval Office.”
President Obama was quick to support the players’
union, saying that a 10% reduction in player salaries across the board proves
that ownership is not serious about a deal, and that they have only one
objective – breaking the union. The
Romney campaign immediately tweeted, “How sad.
Hockey owners are attacked, and his first reaction is to apologize for
foreign hockey players.”
The lock out is expected to be lengthy. Some players cannot wait until a collective
bargaining agreement is signed and are taking their talents overseas. Penguins star forward Evgeni Malkin, brother
of Fox News conservative firebrand Michelle Malkin, has signed to play in the
KHL (Kommunist Hockey League), and Alex Ovechkin, the overweight Capitals’
former superstar, is prepared to join him.
Ovechkin was quoted in the Moscow Daily Worker as saying, “I like Russia to be playing in. I can see my house from here.”
Tim Thomas saw these player defections as another
example of Obama’s anti-hockey policies strengthening his socialist
benefactors. “I thought Obama was
supposed to be pro-union, but I guess he meant pro-Soviet Union.”
When a reporter reminded Thomas that the Soviet Union no longer existed, Thomas waited until no
one was looking and then he slashed the back of the reporter’s legs with his
stick and applied a forearm blocker to his face.
"Hey," Thomas shouted. "This is my area. Come near me and you'll get hurt."
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