Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Plant the Bulbs

An Open Letter to the Editors of MSRP:

It is time we shed some darkness on an important issue regarding the long, slow dissolution of freedom in America.  Yes, that’s right, Right.  I said shed some “darkness”.  That is not a slip of the keyboard.  Let me explain.

In 2007, closet Democratic President George W. Bush signed into law a bill that would ban the sale of incandescent light bulbs in this country by the year 2014.  Our free choice to purchase these household staples will be taken from us incrementally, with 100 watt bulbs disappearing from shelves in 2012, 75 watts in 2013, and the rest of the bulb roster in 2014.  Our freedoms are on a dimmer switch headed towards extinction, and we cannot stand idly by any longer.

There is a knee jerk RINO approach to this imaginary crisis gaining momentum in Congress.  A movement is afoot to repeal the ban on these bulbs, but repeal ,while it has appeal, would be a raw deal.  This kind of incremental approach will not make us more free, and it will not get us any closer to energy independence.  Incandescent bulbs are burning fossil fuels, and the terrorists who hate us are laughing at America all the way to the jihad.  Going back to the old bulbs is not enough.  It is time we stop cowering in the light.  It is time we go all the way.

The real solution is the free market based boycott of ALL light bulbs.

This is not as silly as you might think.  In order to save taxpayers the most, and insure that our great country is on an irreversible path to energy freedom and independence, we need to boycott the purchase of all light bulbs.  It is only in darkness that we can be completely free.  Just like stars come out at night and shine brightest in the darkest areas of the country, you too will you see the light when light bulbs are added to the dust heap of history, like the horse-drawn carriage, the Family Hour, and Tang.

The Obama administration opposes repeal of the bulb ban because it would roll back standards that are already driving U.S. innovation, creating new manufacturing jobs and reducing greenhouse gas emissions. The White House “said” the bulbs will “save” American households nearly $6 billion in 2015 “alone”.  What this administration has forgotten to tell you is that this ‘savings’ is compared to what Americans spend today on bulbs and electricity.  The real question is how much more could we save by avoiding the light bulb completely?  How many more Yankee Candle jobs could be created in the new Non-Bulb economy?  And greenhouse gases, which are a radical leftist forgery anyhow, would be eliminated without millions of light bulbs heating up the atmosphere.  (Did you ever stop to think that these “green” gases are conveniently ‘invisible’?  They’re not even green!  Wake up!)

We didn’t ask for rural electrification from the government, and now the very existence of the light serves as a tax on working people.  The Feds are fooling no one.  Paying sales taxes on light bulb purchases supports the subsidized high tension wires that litter our landscape.  If you Leftie tree huggers weren’t such hypocrites, you’d join us.  The bulb symbolizes dependence, and believe me when I say this – no one needs me, and that makes me proud.

The liberal hypocrisy on this issue is stunning.  The light bulb, since Ben Franklin invented it during the Big Storm, has been attracting defenseless moths with its’ halo of light and heat to a fiery demise.  Where are you, PETA?  I can’t hear you!  The libs are willing to sacrifice one species, the moth, to save another, us.  How does that jive with your lofty philosophies and principles of fairness and equality?  Until I see PETA throwing paint onto a GE executive, they’re all hypocrites!

The argument that has been advanced in favor of this centralized planning approach of light bulb choice has dubious merit.  If we pay more for the curly elitist light bulbs today, we are told, we as a nation will save billions in energy costs tomorrow.   The government neglects to mention that you and I might not be around to enjoy the energy savings tomorrow.  That represents a hidden, yet massive redistribution of savings to future generations, and they haven’t paid any taxes yet.  These future freeloaders should not get to benefit from our hard-earned energy savings anymore than we can benefit today from their futuristic jet packs and hovercrafts.

We can no longer be fooled by deceptive statistics and confusing facts, like the numbers that energy-saving improvements in refrigerators carried out since the 1970s now save Americans $20 billion a year, or $150 a family.  The Energy Department is pedaling these numbers when the real comparison would be refrigerators versus ice wells dug in the back yard.  Live in the dark, and see how much money you save on the ol’ electric bill.

Think this through, America.  Living in the dark has gotten a bad reputation from, who else – liberals.  Liberal professors with their idol worship of “knowledge” have taught for years about the perils and tribulations of the so-called Dark Ages.  What these self-proclaimed ‘thinkers’ conveniently leave out is that during the Dark Ages, there was light outside more than half of every day.  It wasn’t dark all the time, and God’s sun shone brightly on their castles.  Conversely, it is scientific fact that half of every day during the Enlightenment Period was dark.  Seems once you peel back the bias, there were some dark times even during the Enlightened years.  These statistics are conveniently omitted from school textbooks by the well-heeled elite in their squeaky-clean Ivory Soap towers. 
And while we’re at it, what ever happened to our choice of leaded fuel and our personal responsibility to check the quality of our own food before buying it?  I’ll tell you what happened.  FDR and the nanny state mentality that killed rugged individualism and self-reliance in America.  If we don’t stand up to this light bulb fiasco now, the slope will continue to slide in its slippery way, Comrade.  It is what slopes do.

Michele Bachmann of Minnesota said that under Obama "we bought a bureaucracy that now tells us which light bulbs to buy."  Wrong, Congressman.  It was RINO George W. Bush who signed the law, but that goes to show how insipid the reach of the socialist planners can be.  They even got to our man George with their overreaching agenda.  Next, the government could mandate job-destroying sprinkler systems for buildings, or employment-discouraging food handling standards, or unemployment-promoting controls of mercury levels.  Where does it end?  One day it’s the light bulb, and the next day, they are taking all of our guns.  Connect the dots, America.

In speaking about these fancy bulbs shaped like a boa constrictor-shaped preparing to squeeze the liberty out of every American, Rep. Rush Holt, D-N.J, said, "Yes, this costs a few dimes more. But let me tell you, you start saving dimes the moment you screw these into the socket."  One thing is true – someone is making dimes when something’s screwed, but I am afraid you and I are the screw-ees. 

Join our crusade by keeping your family in the dark and staying there…unless you want to be one of the screw-ees.

Marvin Disgruntled
Reluctant Reader
Your Town, USA

1 comment:

  1. i have often wondered about why massive building businesses keep their lights on all night... i suppose for security reasons, but why have alarm systems? what about motion detector lights inside the buildings? i was at an MLS game a few weeks ago and the mountains of recyclable bottles, etc., in the bins marked "garbage" made my skin crawl... i fear that none of it will be recycled because the containers don't exist (the "recycling only" bins were also full) and that the maintenance workers are disinterested or lazy... so why do we bother as residents, when our weekly meagre offerings of recyclable content doesn't even add up to one event's mis-designated materials... :(