Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Survivor: Chantilly


I am completely alone for approximately 40 minutes each day, 20 minutes in the morning, and 20 minutes in the evening.  I am living for those few minutes in a sensory deprivation chamber of my own design.  I am off the grid, the Invisible Man.  Alone, but not lonely. 

Today is Day 24 without a personal cell phone. 

My cell phone was my work phone, and I changed jobs in the beginning of the month, so that phone was dutifully returned to my previous employer.  I fully intend to get a replacement phone, with enough sizzle to impress strangers, with enough features to wow my friends, and as little monthly recurring cost as possible to satisfy my budget.  I just haven't gotten around to it, and that's OK.

To clarify that last statement, that's OK...with me.  I seem to be the only one not put out my my lack of a cellular ball and chain.  Some (aka 'spouse') are concerned about my availability.  Some are concerned about my safety.  Some are concerned that I might be concerned.  I will admit that when driving, I do think that a phone would be handy in case of an emergency.  If I had a flat tire, a phone would be nice.  Hit a deer, and I could make a call.  Otherwise, I'm OK.

To those who would like to talk to me during my downtime, sorry.  Try the home number if you have been deemed worthy of access to the unlisted secret, 256-bit encrypted 10 digit code.  To those who never called me anyway, I will continue to trust that you've been dialing the old number for 3 weeks now in frustration.  Keep trying.

Soon I will rejoin what passes for the Communication Revolution in our world, texting and chatting to fill the minutes - total connectivity without the fussy mess of intimacy and meaningful conversation.  I may get a ticket for speeding, but distracted driving?  Not this month.  Good luck, Verizon.  I'll be a hard sell.

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