Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Can't We All Just Get Along?

It’s less than 4 months before Election Day, and the two parties remain far apart on a variety of issues.  The union that at one time seemed indivisible appears not be salvageable, and we are on the brink of a bitter battle for nothing less than personal freedom.

On days like this, I don’t see any hope of consensus.  There are differences of opinion on family values.  There are disagreements on spending.  The choice of vacation destination becomes fuel for partisan bickering and competing press releases.  We hear that one side is aloof and unfeeling.  Then we hear that the other side is ‘different’ and secretly manipulative.  Before long, the religion card gets played and the rancor spirals out of control.  The environment has grown too toxic - so toxic that what really matters is forgotten.


Our national arguments over taxes, spending, foreign policy, and social issues is not unlike the Cruise-Holmes dynamic.  Two sides that are represented by massive egos and powerful personalities find that they no longer share any common ground.  They have drifted apart, and the media celebrates (encourages) the public clashes and whisper campaigns.  After all, it’s good for ratings.  It’s no wonder we can’t come together to solve problems.  Our national interest is surely as important as the future of little Suri Cruise, and she has less debt to worry about paying back.  So how can we bridge this national divide?

We must turn to the power of the ballot box.  I suggest exercising your right to write in the names of the only ticket that can bring people together quickly and amicably to resolve issues of monumental importance – Fields and Wolfe for President.

Not familiar with Fields and Wolfe?  You should be.  That’s Bert Fields, divorce attorney for Tom Cruise and Jonathan Wolfe, divorce attorney for Katie Holmes. 
Look at their stellar track record for reaching across the aisle to get things done.  The initial divorce papers were filed on June 29th.  In less than 2 weeks, a final decree agreement was signed by both parties.  Given the combatants in this marital union, this could have easily devolved into a martial union, fought with the conventional weapons of dueling Today Show appearances and spicy Us Weekly cover exposes about secret Mormon rituals and hidden sexual predilections.  It would have driven magazine sales through the roof but at the expense of poor little Suri’s future emotional health.  Instead, we have compromise and peace in our time.  Everyone wins, and isn’t that what we want for America?
If these guys can quickly, quietly and amicably resolve what was destined to be the divorce circus of the young century, then I feel completely comfortable giving them a crack at the legislative and executive branches.  Fields and Wolfe somehow got two massive egos to focus for just a moment beyond their own star-studded needs and onto the greater good, Suri.  Could Fields and Wolfe bring Democrats and Republicans together for the greater good, our economic health, just this once?

I’ll have the Nobel Committee on speed dial.

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